They have replaced the
cream pies with buckshot,
The seltzer water with expletives.
Instead of physically stumbling,
They just watch the dollar
Do its best Chaplin,
Skittering in and out of the gutter.
I had hoped everyone had grown tired
Of this joke tears ago, but a nation that gives
The "You Might Be a Redneck" Guy
His own brand of beef jerky
Is a glutton for this kind of silliness.
Francine's Version -- Hezekiah's
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